Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in mei_monster's LiveJournal:

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Monday, May 8th, 2006
10:56 am	what should I complain about today nothing at all, I look amazing. the monkey glands are working... (Comment on this)
Thursday, May 4th, 2006
10:34 am	french pugilists favorite guotes about france and its people: “The best government is a benevolent tyranny tempered by an occasional assassination.” "I know loving you is treason against France, but not loving you would be treason against my heart." "I'd like to see Paris before I die. Philadelphia will do." "You should judge an American president by how much the French hates him." "You only have to look back at 1935. There were people then who were against France arming itself, and look what happened." (Comment on this)
Thursday, April 13th, 2006
1:30 pm	invidious reminder Ingmar Bergman Your film will be 57% romantic, 36% comedy, 45% complex plot, and a $ 43 million budget. Your life will be portrayed on film as an intense psychological drama, likely with some actresses screaming at the camera (Persona), or maybe a pleasant chess game between the Grim Reaper and a Crusader (The Seventh Seal). This Swedish director's films are intensely scrutinzed and studied in colleges all over the world to this day. This means that most Americans still don't understand his films! Still alive, he released in the U.S. in 2005 his first film in 23 years (Saraband), and he can still take on one more project to make your film biography. If curious, start with his films Wild Strawberries and Smiles of a Summer Night. My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 37% on action-romance You scored higher than 61% on humor You scored higher than 78% on complexity You scored higher than 90% on budget Link: The Director Who Films Your Life Test written by bingomosquito on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test I really wanted Ed Wood Jr. as my life coach...I mean director (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, February 14th, 2006
4:54 pm	a job interview, a parking ticket, tis' the life in los angeles 2006 started with the sound of a car door shutting in front of my mom's house - me, leaving home at the tender age of 25. here I am, a ghetto snob in hollywood...some mornings I mistake the pla-boy liquor store’s neon sign for the alpenglow of the cotton fields back home. how long will I stay ebullient before the reality of sweaty car seats and laundromat actors set in? will puissant industry royalty simply walk all over my taffeta? earning the same amount of beans now as I did back in college really puts an end to my querulous depreciation… chin up chinky. if I wanted to lead a comfortable life back in SF pushing papers, I wouldn't be here now, using my salty college education counting lace trimmings. (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, December 19th, 2005
6:14 pm	hale and hearty thanks to yoko and her  half empty bottle of whiskey,  we did not yield to the  susurrus  of the vampires outside of  harajuku station. (Comment on this)
Sunday, December 18th, 2005
5:58 pm	nerds with panache yogurt cames in many flavours and forms but in tokyo, you can drink it straight up or on the rocks.  we didn't think alcoholic yogurt would taste good or get us tossed.....how wrong we were. (Comment on this)
Monday, October 31st, 2005
10:43 pm	Fräulein mei mei ich liebe tps reports (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Thursday, October 27th, 2005
1:21 pm	votaries of macy's we are masters of prestidigitation who knows how to dodge around the clock and revel in other people's power and pelf - eating the darkest cheesecake on their whitest couch.  other activities on the home furnishing floor include but not exclusive to: hide and go seek in the demo beds, ghosts underneath the dinning tables, and marco polo on persian carpets. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Friday, October 7th, 2005
10:51 am	malediction of the vowels did james hear the tocsin of my victory when he picked up his fourth E. (Comment on this)
Sunday, October 2nd, 2005
3:06 pm	jass new orleans may still be underwater. we might be at the nadir of minimum wage jobs for college graduates, but we have sausalito's elite cultural class to turn to for comfort. oh wait, I'm not from fresno, I hate marin yuppies and their hippie parents, they are the real puerile cartoons of jass. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, September 22nd, 2005
12:43 pm	one little cancer bracelet at a time if I see one more sugergay's mark mcgrath looking numbnuts wearing that fucking yellow cancer bracelet....I might have to sheryl crowbar them in where their balls use to be. before you start telling people I support cancer and george bush, hear me out. I'm not too cool to turn my nose at mediocrity, but here's the type of thing I like to see and read. bono poised in front of a portal to africa and answering questions about stuff. Whenever we listen to U2, my daughter never fails to say, "I like this man's big voice, and Mom, he fights for Africa!" Heartfelt thanks for your boundless and tireless generosity and evangelization for all Africans! - Cristina Merlo, New York that's right little girl, you know what they say about guys with big voices....they also have big hearts (get your mind out of the gutter). In the United States you'd expect it to be something like: "This is America. You're Irish. Go home." I love it when bono starts to get raw on racial tension in america. I'm a rock star: my natural home is on the barricades with a handkerchief over my face — much hipper than putting on a suit and hanging out with politicians. But as the Edge has pointed out (with more than a little despair in his voice), I'd have lunch with the devil if I thought it would make a difference. this is what I'm talking about, the real bono. (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, September 10th, 2005
8:43 am	mei monster's guide to san francisco 1. stay away from Asstro, known to the gays as Castro, unless you don't mind being judged and probed. 2. pacific heights: fact: rich white girls give the best head 3. haight street is for OC boys and girls and their middle class hippie punk friends 4. downtown is home to the scums of the earth - really degenerate homeless people and really really degenerate white collar dingbags. 5. sunset: fact: boring. but you can find excellent ethnic food from first generation refugees. clement street never disappoint. 6. the mission is your best bet for a night of conquest and debauchery if you don't mind the stench of hepatitis with your burrito. 7. north beach: farrago of human waste, you will hit the herpes jackpot on any friday night. 8. the marina: see number two but on date night. 9. the filmore is overrated and overpriced 10. japantown: the worst place to get japanese food. 11. chinatown: what's not to like about immigrant slums 12. don't avoid the tourist traps just because they are tourist traps - you're probably the coolest person there, think about all the teenagers you can pick up even if they are with their grandparents. (Comment on this)
Sunday, September 4th, 2005
9:52 am	quaff or die tryin my approval rating of fiddy just went up 51 dow joneses in the steven seagal index. (Comment on this)
Monday, August 15th, 2005
2:17 pm	the crucible I’m currently bonneting actors for this play and the director made a little speech about how this play represents the current global/political climate where god and state are no longer separate and people go to war in the name of religion. I had a michael moore suspicion that the comment was directed at bush and his republican bible thumpers. Being a porn reading, sometimes inhaling, free market atheist, I totally agree that prayers have no place in schools or public policies and displays of religion should be nugatory. However, I do not see America as a puritan state esp. since I am an equal opportunity offender of all religion and cultures. Think about it, isn’t it great that muslim women in America can slutty themselves and not get stoned in public. Christians, Jews, incesty Mormons can all peddle their cant on the internet for $12.99/mo in any of the 50 states. I could go on but I have another important wild tangent point to make. When Arthur Miller wrote the crucible in 1952, it was a response to senator mccarthy’s crusade to john wayne communist sympathizers. I read the play in college when I took acting for dummies and coincidently I was also attending a lecture in modern Chinese history. When I finished act ii scene iv, I felt the play can be interpreted as a critique of communism itself and the Chinese cultural revolution in particular. Communist ideology is a lot like the salem religious order – everyone must think alike, dress alike, subfusc alike and never ever question the head wizard in charge. The crucible plot follows teenage girls gone puberty crazy and substituting slander for cheap drug store makeup. The cultural revolution was also stirred up by teenagers gone wild and unleashing leftist hell upon professors, writers, doctors, actors, monks and even family members. They waylaid innocent people in their respectable workplace and homes, dragged them into the streets or courtyard to exercise physical humiliation and castigation. Those (middle class suburban revolutionary hippies) who didn’t grow up in Stalinist hardship are easily flummoxed by the surreality of history and that is why I’m putting out a reading list before we unleash an all out class war. Can I get a what what… 1. The Private Life of Chairman Mao: The Memoirs of Mao's Personal Physician Dr. Li Zhisui (everything you want to know about the greatest dearest sexiest leader - like STDs up the ying yang – pun intended) 2. Born Red: A Chronicle of the Cultural Revolution by Yuan Gao (a major difference between miller’s work – john proctor doesn’t get gang raped by his flock of adolescent admirers) 3. Fight Club by Chuck Palahniuk (I got nothing clever left to say here) (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, August 7th, 2005
7:08 pm	coked out crab salad eating wastrels sometimes $500 bejeweled, gold chained and feathered footwear can be so wrong, it becomes right. and sometimes neiman marcus himself can't stop us from putting our sweaty feet in his prada (Comment on this)
Thursday, August 4th, 2005
10:37 am	SF Confidential yes, catchy titles are usually better than the entry itself but not today. the FBI raided my work - the Department of Building Inspections baby! news whores, busybodies, confused interns scurried about in this whirl wind of frontline cum 60 minutes type of investigation and capture. "they are taking gus!" "they are taking gus in handcuffs!" oh man, who's going to drive his black mercedes home? anyhoo, I believe everyone who was questioned today and escorted out had likely committed some malfeasance in his capacity. Isn't it common knowledge that civil servants disregard public interest and follow party fealty to the gallows? (Comment on this)
Sunday, July 10th, 2005
7:19 pm	Train in Vain It's easy for poor people to be all hip and post modern but where do middle class twinkies go for some authentic avant garde action? My prayers have been answered by the good people at the Golden Gate Railway Museum. You can rent this exquisite art deco train cart for $75/hr and dick around the other trains for free - I recommend going at night so the place feels haunted (total make out mood). But I hope stupid ravers never reads this, I would hate to see them mess up the atmosphere with their unz unz music and STDs. *you can bring your own potables, please don't act like dumb frat boys and destroy the place. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, July 7th, 2005
7:53 pm	because we live in a material world You scored as Materialist. Materialism stresses the essence of fundamental particles. Everything that exists is purely physical matter and there is no special force that holds life together. You believe that anything can be explained by breaking it up into its pieces. i.e. the big picture can be understood by its smaller elements. </td> Modernist 94% Existentialist 94% Materialist 94% Cultural Creative 69% Idealist 50% Romanticist 44% Postmodernist 38% Fundamentalist 25% What is Your World View? (updated) created with QuizFarm.com I feel bad for capitalism, it's gotten such a bad rap ever since Wall Street-the movie. capitalism has its problems but it's also very misunderstood kind of like willy wonka and the chocolate factory. yeah, you don't tend to think of willy wonka as the big bad capitalist pig because he's thin and stylish, but he is. And we all benefit from it, workers, consumers, business owners. the real bad guys are the union reps and government regulators (don't get me started on lawyers). isn't it sad that mr. wonka has to fire all his midgets because they're not union or it's considered mistreatment to have midgets working in small confined spaces. the real question is, are the little (literally) people better off working at the factory for a wage or making toys for free at the north pole? also, capitalism = competition, which bring the cost of chocolate down so poor kids like charlie can afford to eat one too. sometimes the government has to step in so that willy wonka isn't the only candyman on the block hawking sweets. other times, government chimes in for the worse, like banning all chocolate because some fat kid choked on the wrapper. What that creates is a black market sugar network (glucose related crimes are ineluctable as gravity) - the stuff might be mixed with dish detergent but you're so desperate for a sugar high, you take it. The next morning you wake up in your own caramel. *disclaimer: johnny depp is delicious, how can capitalism be bad? I forgot what disclaimer means. (Comment on this)
Thursday, June 30th, 2005
8:07 pm	growing pains loud mouth pink fat people eater I got bullied in elementary school, middle school, and parts of high school, by tall black girls, jocks and uneducated people in general. When I turned pissed drunk on my 19th birthday, I made a promise to myself that I would never stand down to bullies (maybe I even bullied other nerds). But some things like cafeteria corn dogs never change. On a peaceful sunny day at City Hall, I took my 18-year-old intern with me on an assignment. I asked her to take a picture of the reel cabinets for our records. But as you can see from the picture, this XXL rockabilly hag was having a low calorie day and decided to take her anger out on us. She said she was not in the mood to be photographed after we took the picture, but she went on saying she was going to snatch the camera and my intern's face. I should preface this by saying we didn’t know she was hungry/cranky and we thought we were in a free country. Anyway, I ignored her callow unsophistication and continued our research. As the super sized cunt bucket got up to leave, she decided to tell my intern off. Boy, I got up and told her politely not to speak that way to my intern because she was following my orders. Now that I marked myself as her target, she really let me have it. (Comment on this)
Thursday, June 23rd, 2005
10:12 am	pictures from China my dad took this picture, I found it pleasant, it's nice to see little boys interacting peacefully. they have their whole lives ahead of them to fight and steal the other guy's livestock. (Comment on this)